Saturday, November 08, 2008

in addition..

Oswald Chambers:

"The disciple who abides in Jesus is the will of God, and his apparently free choices are God's fore-ordained decrees. Mysterious? Logically contradictory and absurd? Yes, but a glorious truth to a saint."

election & a pick-me-up

How can I blog without mention of the recent election? No matter your party, your views, your opinion of the candidates, your race, your interpretation of politics according to the Bible... God was, is, and always will be. I think Derek Webb says is well- that we, as believers, serve a King & a Kingdom. Our Father in Heaven is in all and above all. So, where is all this anger coming from?

Whether who you voted for lost or won, trust ultimately lies in our Creator, not in one of His creatures.


On another note, this verse has spoken volumes to me this past week. Someone passed it on to me, so I figured I would share it with you:
Praise be to the Lord, to God our Savior, who daily bears our burdens.
Psalm 68:19

The verse has been powerful for many reasons, so it's great to rest assured that I am not alone. My Savior daily carries the weight that I try to carry on my own. Every day, He is there, ready and willing to take on my cares, my issues, my mess. I am not alone. I can cast all of my anxieties on Him because He cares for me. Praise be to the Lord, to God my Savior, who daily bears my burdens!!

Friday, October 17, 2008

stealing computers

think about this with me. how many times have we left our computers unattended in a public place, or seen someone else do it? (this is not a rhetorical question)

confession: i just did it. i set my computer bag in a booth at panera and went to the bathroom. my justification upon doing it was that all the guys around my booth were on their own computers.

once i entered the bathroom, the thought crossed my mind that one of those guys might be a computer stealer: someone who camps out at places like panera, coffee shops, & other free wifi joints, waiting for an trusting individual (like myself) to leave the computer for a short time. then, as soon as the victim walks away, the predator packs up his own stuff and on his bolt out the door, grabs the lonely computer!!! the culprit simply used his computer as a guise.

final thoughts:
i believe it's absolutely absurd that i left my computer out in the open, and i could blame it on the fact that i never used to lock my house or car until college... but i won't. what can you blame it on?

Saturday, September 27, 2008

in the spotlight

IN THE SPOTLIGHT is a new feature i'm adding to my blog.... it will feature a piece of art by me that tells a story or has a story behind it. i hope you look forward to these!

first, i wanted to spotlight the photo at the top of my blog page.

it's only a fraction of one of my favorite photos of all time! it was taken when i studied abroad in granada, spain-- in a plaza (i forget which one right now) that i really loved. it was so lively; live music all the time, tons of florists' shops bordering the square, and people talking and eating outside. a true european experience! i just happened to get a shot of this little child crawling in the sunlight. i couldn't have planned this if i wanted to.

here is the original:

Monday, September 22, 2008

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

so, i think i can dance

looking at my previous few posts, i realized that they have been pretty intense. and as we all know, that just isn't my life at all. i have moments of intensity, yes, but i figured that my silly side needs to come out in my blog more.

so, lately, i've been trying to dance better. i'm trying to perfect a few moves at a time. so far, i feel as if my "walk it out" has gotten to a level where i'd do it in public settings. my robot, however, isn't so great, but i still do it because who really does it all that well anyways?! i'm not naturally a great dancer. thankfully, i got the rhythm gene from my mother, so i can stay on beat for the most part. however, i really have to be taught how to dance, how to put moves together, etc. i learned how to "walk it out" via youtube instructions (you can make fun of me) and that proved successful, so that may be my main mode of learning to dance.

this is how i learned:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WMHblX16TSA

Friday, September 12, 2008

when i am weak, then i am strong

I just got back tonight from a jam-packed week in Philly. I'm still processing a lot of the info given to me, but I wanted to write a little before I hit the sack.

Being in a "class" or group with some amazing others was definitely a highlight of the week. It was really encouraging being around those with similar career paths. Hearing their life stories and all that God has done for them further convinced me that this is where My Father wants me right now. I felt so loved by the WHM Office/Sending Center the entire week, and I couldn't ask for a more prayerful group of people! From the food to the car rides, foosball games to Betsy's iced caramel lattes, conversations to homemade dinners every night... I cannot describe to you the love and care I feel from the people I spent time with.

I am so moved and thankful for everything. I feel this constant bear hug around me right now.... haha!

And to make things a little more clear, I am now beginning to raise support for my time in Spain. Prayer would be greatly appreciated and needed, because I cannot do any of this on my own, and I am hoping to depart in March (which means not very much time to raise funds!) I am holding strongly to the verse when God speaks to Paul: "My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness" (2 Cor. 12:9).

Then, Paul continues with, "Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me. Therefore I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ's sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong."

thanks for your prayers and i'll keep you posted along this journey.


Monday, September 01, 2008

getting the ball rolling

This afternoon, I spoke with a missionary couple serving in Granada-- Tom & Jane Wills. I felt like it was a good initial conversation with them. I hope to be having many more. I'm also ready to be over there.

I am nervous about next week when I have Assessment & Orientation Week up in Philadelphia. I had to fill out a few tests, and I will be receiving my results from them, so it should be interesting and informative. Now that I think about it, excitement trumps my anxiety.... I get to meet some new people who will be doing the same thing as me for the next couple years! I hope I am able to really connect with at least one other girl while I am there. Additionally, I will be living with a family for a week, so that will bring new experiences!

More about the convo with Tom & Jane: Like I was already praying, they told me that an ideal scenario would be for me to be in Spain by March. I was thrilled with that news! What's difficult about that, though, is less time being around the family. It's tough to even talk about leaving for Spain, because I know it's difficult for my family. I think it's hard to understand what I'm doing when one hasn't felt a calling like this before. On the other hand, it's hard for me to understand where my parents are coming from because I don't have children. Two years isn't that long, though!! While in Granada, I feel like I'll have my hands in many different things... I like the idea of meeting people, building relationships, sharing the gospel, learning Spanish, living in community, working alongside of a team, planting a church, and meeting any other needs.

I know that support-raising is a faith-building process, but I'm already worried about doing it. It's such a blessing that for the past few summers I haven't had any problem raising funds, and I've had the most amazing support team. However, this time I'm gone for much longer and already feel alone. In the past, several friends and I raised support simultaneously and I was in school around all my friends. This time is just different, and I'm going to start praying for my support tonight. I would really love to be gone by March..... maybe spend another birthday at the beach in Nerja?? :)

Monday, August 25, 2008

last week living in charlotte

i've considered charlotte my home for the past 4 years now. although i've taken 2-3 month sabbaticals living elsewhere, i always come back to charlotte. this next week will technically be my last week living here in the Queen City.

it's not that i haven't come to love living in charlotte (finally), but i've decided to pursue missions in granada, spain instead. if you know me, you probably know some of my passions include loving & serving others, building relationships, living in community, church-planting, speaking spanish, learning about different cultures, traveling, and trying to live out the Great Commission. and that's what lies ahead of me in granada. it would be crazy for me to not run hard after this opportunity.

as of right now, i attend World Harvest's evaluation week September 7-12. then after that, i hope to begin raising support and working part-time somewhere!



i am this excited!!!!!!!

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

encouragement

a verse the Lord showed me tonight....


Whether you turn to the right or to the left,
your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying,
"This is the way; walk in it."

isaiah 30:21

Sunday, August 03, 2008

unwinding, debriefing, reflecting, evaluating, introspecting.....

while doing those things listed above, i generally allow music to minister to me. this song below seems to line up with a lot of what i've been thinking and what the Lord has been revealing to me lately.

Loving a person just the way they are, it's no small thing
It takes some time to see things through
Sometimes things change, sometimes we're waiting
We need grace either way

Hold on to me
I'll hold on to you
Let's find out the beauty of seeing things through

There's a lot of pain in reaching out and trying
It's a vulnerable place to be
Love and pride can't occupy the same spaces baby
Only one makes you free

Hold on to me
I'll hold on to you
Let's find out the beauty of seeing things through

If we go looking for offense
We're going to find it
If we go looking for real love
We're going to find it

sara groves, loving a person

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

peace & deliverance

i cannot believe the summer months have almost passed. it feels as if i'm in the eye of the hurricane-- like everything around me is up in the air, like i should be a basketcase or really chaotic myself-- but i'm not. props to God! that sounds corny, but seeing as how i'm watching opportunities pass on by, yet feel at peace where i'm standing, is a sheer act of His supernatural power!!

i'm beginning to realize that all i have to offer is my life, my service, myself-- to the Lord. He wants me to follow Him no matter what, where, who, when, why, or how. His plan is way bigger than i can even begin to imagine for myself. we're all a part of something greater than our little worlds. i'm believing He is preparing me for something wonderful and befitting, even if it's not even on the radar right now.

i have decided to live in Charlotte indefinitely. i'm living with some friends in the university area and working rent-paying jobs. i hope to become more involved with my church, especially its youth, and, God-willing, take some sort of educational course. i also want to continue making art and will work on putting together gallery-worthy pieces.

i will now leave you with lyrics to a song i can't stop listening to lately. although it's a couple years old, mat kearney's "girl america" won't quit knocking on my heart's door. here are a few lines:

My girl America, can't you see
It's not the circumstances that determine who you're gonna be
But how you deal with these problems and pains that come your way
It's for you that I pray with hope for a brighter day
So I say, your deliverance is comin'


Monday, July 07, 2008

nothing profound

per request of my mother, i'm going to write a bit.

both a lot and a little has been going on lately. allow me to explain.

it's been almost a month since my last post unfortunately. here are some highlights from that uncharted time....

june 10: my cousin, shaul, graduated from ministry school.

june 13: free movie on the lawn at freedom park

me & meghan

june 14: bridal shower for natalie & fun out on the town with megan



june 21: klif & amanda wommack's wedding on hilton head island with jessica as my date!


june 26: got to hang out with nana at the beach for a day

june 27: douglas & kaitlin rose's wedding in charleston/kiawah!

july 2: brickhouse dinner with the fam for jacob's bday


july 3: pops in the park (symphony at freedom park) & FIREWORKS!!


july 4: mamaw & papaw's for cookout & FIREWORKS!!





lastly, here's a little fruit from the garden i'm tending...


more to come....

Monday, June 09, 2008

i'm still alive

i'm hopeful. been thinking a lot. i have a lot of time to think.

i like watering plants, watching them grow. watching tomatoes ripening daily inspires me.

human birth has also been all around me lately. from newly pregos to newborns, i love being around new life!

i also sold my first painting saturday. i'm actually quite thrilled about it, because it was a decent-sized one and it gave me some much-needed confidence.


the painting which sold!


Saturday, May 31, 2008

multi-tasking creatures

let me tell you, i have really been enjoying the weather lately. it all started when my a/c broke in my car about 2 weeks ago and i've been driving with the windows down all the time. i love experiencing the sounds of the street, people, cars, and music drowned out by the wind. (i've actually missed my turn several times because i'm so distracted). seeing people walk down the street, staring at the driver next to me at the stoplight, city lights, and watching the blurry trees whip past me. what i noticed most tonight was the smell. the smell of wind, of humidity, of the country versus the city, and of the italian restaurant's dinner menu.

the crazy thing, though, is that we can listen, see, and smell (as well as drive and think) all at the same time. we're innately multi-taskers. God made our bodies to perform countless functions simultaneously. i don't understand what goes on internally, but i am so thankful we are complex creatures. it's all a part of God's mystery.

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

i'm lazy

my sweet mother came over to my place for a solid 5 hours to help me pack up my apartment. first of all, i have too much stuff. way too much stuff. i desire to lead a much simpler life than i do.

by the end of the packing time and as we were talking afterwards, i realized that i am very lazy. the reason i buy gifts or cards and don't end up sending them to people is because i'm lazy. wow, i've never called or considered myself that, and it really makes me angry. so, i want to fight this and become a harder worker. i'm praying through a few verses that will hopefully encourage me to not be lazy.

"For even when we were with you, we used to give you this order: if anyone is not willing to work, then he is not to eat, either.
For we hear that some among you are leading an undisciplined life, doing no work at all, but acting like busybodies.
Now such persons we command and exhort in the Lord Jesus Christ to work in quiet fashion and eat their own bread."
2 Thessalonians 3:10-12

"A lazy man does not roast his prey, but the precious possession of a man is diligence."
Proverbs 12:27

"Not lagging behind in diligence, fervent in spirit, serving the Lord."
Romans 12:11


Sunday, May 25, 2008

get ready....

i think something big is about to happen. i feel it in the air. the Spirit is moving. i just had to share that i feel it. it's thick.

i'll let you know when something happens.

until then, here are recent photos from my trip to DC (Annandale, VA). i mostly visited and hung out with Graham & Nicole and their friends. the Davis' were so loving and hospitable. i soaked in all their love and rested a ton. i wish i could see them more!

also, mark beavers took me to my first MLB game! the Nationals lost to the Phillies by 1 run in the 9th.
me, coley, kim

the davis'


only six months behind... or ahead

The first of June is just around the corner, and I decided that I want to once again attempt to read the Bible in a year. I figured that writing this on my blog would naturally keep me accountable. I'm kind of excited about it. The furthest I've made it is through Esther a couple years ago. This time, I plan on reading some OT, some NT, some of a psalm and some of a proverb. I believe this approach will be better for me because it offers variety. We'll see!

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

ramblings of a novice

novice
noun
a person new to or inexperienced in a field or situation

I realized this evening that I am, indeed, a novice. That's a much nicer-sounding word than newbie, beginner or rookie. Novice sounds like I'm going somewhere, have direction, am educated and sophisticated yet lack experience because of my age.

Words mean a lot more to me than I've previously thought. This is supposedly one of the toughest transitions of my life-- at least that's what everyone is telling me. And I believe them. How can I argue when I have never gone through it? I'm not sure why I would want to argue either, considering how many people I know who are going through this transition or have just gone through it... and it was so difficult for them.

Even as hard as it may be, I would like to keep a record of my feelings during this period. I'm not really sure what to call this season of my life yet-- hopefully some hip, cool and clever name-- but I will nonetheless write about my experience as a recent college graduate, who hasn't any clear direction of what to do with her life. Please follow me while I learn to live independent of external financial help (parentals) and dependent on God.

I assure you this will be entertaining, messy, and most of all a learning experience...

Saturday, May 10, 2008

i'm graduating today


today, i'm graduating. it's 4am, i just finished everything i had to do before i sleep, and now i can't sleep.

but i'm graduating today, so sleep is pretty much irrelevant.

i'm having a killer graduation party with BBQ tonight, and i can't wait for all my friends and family to meet. it'll be fun. i'm making guacamole. and i made tons of brownies. mmm..... my faves!

¡felicidades!

Tuesday, May 06, 2008

"just don't freak out!"

I wish I could have recorded what my Senior Seminar professor (Jamie Franki) said today as he gave all of us who are graduating a final lecture. He is already pretty entertaining, but this was wonderful advice he was giving about not only post-college but also the graduation ceremony. He suggested that we take some magazines to read while sitting there because it's so dull; give our "posse" trumpets and other obnoxious noisemakers so they can be loud (since they're supposed to "hold their applause until the very end"); decorate the top of our hats (which i totally agree with.... especially students in the art dept!); and to just be as rowdy as possible without getting arrested. I would love to be one of those people to shake things up a little bit during the ceremony... but I'm not.

He did, however, challenge us to think about what we would want others to know about college. I've already been thinking about that, and I mentioned it in a previous post. As Jamie was giving us advice about post-college, he said a few things that just resonate....
1. be pragmatic: i am not below a job that pays-- maybe i am overqualified, but as a human being, i'm not below any job really. money is important to live.
2. if you hit a slump in which you're not making art, it's okay. it happens. just don't give up.
3. making art is going to look a lot different when we get out of school. on one hand there are no deadlines. but on the other hand, there are no deadlines. haha.
4. spend time with yourself, you art, developing your style, feeding your mind, enriching your soul.... every day. i added some of those things, but i'm sure that's what he meant. just because i'm going to be out of school doesn't give me liberty to not learn. that's ridiculous.
5. just don't freak out! he kept saying this, too... he claims that when the going gets rough, freaking out won't help. so just don't do it. although i was laughing at him i do agree with this, but i tend to freak out often. they're usually mini freak outs, but still present.

I know he said more than this, but I remember these after 5 hours.

Oh yeah, I just finished my final three exams todayyyyy!!!! I didn't get much sleep last night, but I had to go out with a bang (aka no sleep). I'm honestly a little upset with myself because I just haven't performed as well academically as I usually do. My work isn't nearly as strong as last semester, but I haven't cared as much about it. I've been looking into the future and not focusing on the present. That's my one regret for the semester.

I'm going to sleep now.

Thank You, Lord, for being so gracious to me this semester. Even when I didn't perform excellently, I pray that You will still be glorified through my work and in my interactions with my peers. May this time not be in vain.

Sunday, May 04, 2008

john.mayer-justification

so you've probably heard of self-justification... it's when one justifies what they're doing as right. well, john mayer's newest song say just might be my justification for saying some things that i think i need to say. his lyrics are just another poignant reminder that it might be right to say what's on my heart. below are the lyrics:

Take all of your wasted honor

Every little past frustration
Take all of your so-called problems
Better put them in quotations

Say what you need to say (8x)

Walking like a one man army
Fighting with the shadows in your head
Living out the same old moment
Knowing you’d be better off instead
If you could only

Say what you need to say (8x)

Have no fear for giving in
Have no fear for giving over
You better know that in the end
It’s better to say too much
Than never to say what you need to say again

Even if your hands are shaking
And your faith is broken
Even as the eyes are closing
Do it with a heart wide open

Say what you need to say (4x)

Say what you need to say
Say what you need to say
Say what you need to say
Say what you need to
Say what you need to

Say what you need to say (16x)




Friday, May 02, 2008

art kindred

one of my professors always encourages us to find an art kindred spirit. basically, he wants us to latch onto another artist who we can identify with, either because of similar styles, content, lifestyle or whatever else.

here's one of mine, helen frankenthaler. i love that she stains her canvas and that she was part of the AbEx movement.


blue atmosphere, 1963


contentment island, 2002

did you know...?

did you know that if the world continues the same level of oil consumption, it is predicted that by the year 2020 there will be no more oil ....??

guys, this is a big deal.

i really think this is an important thing to consider when voting. just look into the candidates' views on conserving energy resources, their environmental plans, etc.

Wednesday, April 30, 2008

slightly overwhelmed

this world has so much to offer me.
which door will i go through?
i just need to make some decisions, and it's honestly quite overwhelming.
i also have so many desires, goals, passions and dreams for my life.
where do i want to go? who do i want to be? what do i need to do practically to take me there?

i want to be ready for whatever the Lord has in store. so, here are a few things i hope to accomplish this next year:

1. speak more spanish. learn more spanish. use more spanish. teach more spanish.
2. make art. make art. make art. be around art. learn about artists. become friends with more artists.
3. live independently financially.
4. drive less.
5. conserve more. be less wasteful. do my part in taking care of the environment. teach others how to also.
6. read more. lots of books. different types of books.
7. start something. lead something. be involved in something much greater than myself.
8. work at a coffee shop.... no, seriously, i want-- er, have-- to do this. no question.
9. invest deeply in my friends. get to know them.

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

last day of class!!

okay, so today was my last day of class until i graduate college!

i still have one day of finals... so i'm not home free just yet. but, wooooo, it feels so good!

maybe one day i'll write a book on what i learned during my past 5 years of college. or better yet, what i wish i knew before my last year of college! .... OR what i wish someone would've told me before i began college.

i think my calling in life is to be a guidance counselor. how hilarious would that be if i counseled high school kids. well, i could counsel kids and not be a guidance counselor. it's crazy how much i've been thinking about teaching lately. now, i don't know where i would want to teach, but i do know that i would like to stick with the middle/high school agers.

enough of this jabber. i need to finish school first!

I'M ABOUT TO GRADUATE!!!! haha.

fact about me: i love researching things. all types of things. just give me something, and i'll learn everything i possibly can about it. for example, i know way too much about elephants because i got on this huge elephant kick last semester.

Saturday, April 26, 2008

why take care of the earth when it's all going to pot anyway?

If I truly believed what my title says, I would question if I was, in fact, a child of God.

Dang, Tiff, that's a bold statement. Yes, I know it is... That's how strongly I feel about our responsibility in taking care of Creation for the redemption of the world.

Well, what is Creation? You know, when God did all that stuff in the first 6 days, like making light and forming the earth & seas and making animals (the ones Noah took on the big boat) and then making Adam & Eve. Okay, that is all Creation. It's not just you and me, which I feel is a common belief of our conservative Christian society. Well, at least in the South.

Why would God give us all this goodness and then not care if we destroyed it? And I'm speaking to Christians mostly.... because I think we have the narrowest and most unwavering points-of-view on this issue, and i hate it!

To "go green" right now is a trendy thing, and for those who hop on the bandwagons late in the game or not at all, I think you need to reconsider this one. It's redemptive. Let me repeat that, Going green is redemptive.

I can't write like this person, but I found this site on our responsibility as children of the Creator....

Genesis and the Psalms help us understand that the Creation is a gift from God. Everything in Creation is created by God and is good. That is why we, and all other parts of Creation, have intrinsic worth and are sacred. The Psalmists assume that humans have much to learn from nature and that all Creation participates in praise and glorification of God (Psalms 19, 36, 65).

.....
However, the biblical message of environmental justice is more complicated and radical than simply requiring us to manage natural resources wisely and utilize technology and laws to maintain a healthy environment. Creation plays a central role in God's covenants and in the Christian understanding of salvation.

If nothing else, the Bible is a series of stories about covenants. When God makes a covenant with Noah, for example, God also makes a commitment to Creation (Genesis 8-9).... When the covenant is broken, all parties to it are harmed. In Isaiah, we see the earth mourning and withering from the pollution that is the result of people's transgression of the laws.

The Christian covenant is consistent with the Hebraic. As God's incarnation, Jesus has the vocation to restore right relations with the land (in fact, all of nonhuman Creation) as well as to liberate the poor and suffering. (Mark 16:15, John 3:17, Romans 8:18-21.)

http://gbgm-umc.org/umw/environmental/mandates.html


A group of Christian leaders, the Evangelical Climate Initiative, has taken some action. This is from their statement...

"The same love for God and neighbor that compels us to preach salvation through Jesus Christ, protect the unborn, preserve the family and the sanctity of marriage, and take the whole Gospel to a hurting world, also compels us to recognize that human-induced climate change is a serious Christian issue requiring action now..."

What's crazy is that this group of Christian environmentalists were met with an opposing Christian force, one that agrees with the Bush's minimizing the effects of global warming.
All this can be seen in PBS' Moyers on America Series, "Is God Green?"
i just saw this documentary and couldn't believe it!
other resources i dig:

Saving God's Green Earth: Tri Robinson
my first practical eco-friendly book
interview with Michael Wittmer, author of Heaven is a Place on Earth
Engaging God's World: Cornelius Plantinga, Jr.
who killed the electric car? i just saw this documentary and couldn't believe it!
10 practicals
reusable bags
The Great Warming : haven't actually seen it, but it sounds better than An Inconvenient Truth (it has live testimonies from people being affected right now)
treehugger: be the change
stop global warming
National Resources Defense Council


Well, there are so many more that I like, but I'm tired of writing.

I do have some final words: I'm a passionate person, but I don't mean to point fingers at any person more than myself. This post is meant to enlighten and make aware and inform and offer resources. We are all pieces of the puzzle and can take 1 or 2 small steps at first to conserve energy, gas, water, trees and to 'keep Creation.'
I'm simply trying to use fewer limited resources and face my own materialist tendencies head-on (some days more successfully than others!).

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

just for you, jessica





this is my ring from NYC-- per request from red dreamer aka my beautiful friend, jessica bentson.

the attraction to the ring:
1) the color
2) the man who was selling it
3) the location-- we were at this outside market-like thing.... it was so cool!
4) the handmade quality-- the ring was too small, so the vender formed it to my finger size. you can see all the ridge texture from where he beat on it. i love it!

Sunday, April 20, 2008

praying

I thought I'd include that I'm currently praying for a job in Blacksburg. I know you're thinking, "well, yes dear, I would hope so...." But really guys, I'm being proactive about it. So far, I've sent emails to a few places asking if they're hiring. Thank you, craigslist, you were of no help in my job search!

Some places
I'm interested in are teaching middle school, an art store in town, and 4 photography places. Please pray with me that I am seeking God and trusting that He opens and closes doors for His specific purpose. He is good, and I'm so thankful to be His beloved daughter.

open my eyes i wanna see you
open my ears i wanna hear you
open my heart i wanna feel you
and your great love, o Lord... once again

i wanna fall in love... once again
i wanna be more desperate.... once again
i wanna lose my sleep.... once again
falling in love with you

"open my eyes", sarah mcmillan

Saturday, April 19, 2008

i blog more when i don't have rules

one time, i made this rule where i had to blog every day, even if it was just a sentence. but that didn't last long. (it was a different daily blog that i unsuccessfully tried to start)

today was wonderful. bright & early, i drove up to davidson to meet with a couple other youth group leaders. when we finished, there was "art on the green" going on right in front of me. so i got to meet a lot of local artists, talk with them, and see their art. it was divine! i also ran into an old elementary school friend of mine, and that's always nice!

tonight, i came home and felt like painting. i've never painted a portrait of myself, so i figured i'd give it a whirl. i feel like i cheated because i don't normally draw myself from photos, nor do i like to. however, there's not a convenient spot in my apt to sit and draw myself, so i opted to paint from a black & white photograph. this is actually the first figure painting i've made. i've done more gestural figures before, but nothing like this.

well, here it is....

not the best quality photo-- i used burnt sienna, yellow, magenta, & white (no black).


isn't this hilarious?!


Thursday, April 17, 2008

eye irritants

I don't understand, but my eyes are irritated by some eye liners or mascaras-- it's so annoying! Tonight, I borrowed a friend's eyeliner and my eyes did not agree. It doesn't look as bad as the burning and prolonged suffering actually is....

Around my eyes is puffy...

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

hokie spokes, my thoughts on finding an apartment-- and a man

After looking at places to live in Blacksburg today, we found one we really looooove!

It's right in the heart of downtown Blacksburg, above a bicycle shop called Hokie Spokes! It has so much character, is really small and cozy, and I want to live there!! It's as much city life as we could possibly live. And I love the idea of telling people that I live there. The rest of what we saw didn't make me excited... they all looked the same. I almost liken finding a place to live like "finding" a man. Though you may laugh, it feels strangely similar. I could settle for a guy who is nice and would make a decent husband-- but wouldn't I want a guy who would make me excited to say that I am with him?! Well, of course! Strange analogy, but I think it's true.

So, you walk up the door to the right of HOKIE SPOKES and a stairwell leads you up to the quaint apartment.


Tuesday, April 15, 2008

stuff christians like

well, i was just reading a friend's blog and she had this link posted and it's really worth advertising on everyone's blog. the site explains things that christians like...

http://stufffchristianslike.blogspot.com/

it's a must-read... it includes posts like breaking up after a retreat, dating God instead of me, side hugs and so on....

Monday, April 14, 2008

dinner is served!!


look at what i'm eating tonight.... it's vegetarian chili with tortilla chips. really, the chili was from a package & i just added tomatoes and beans. and the chips- well, i did cut up a tortilla and bake them. but it was really easy.

i think i was more excited about my presentation! haha.


ps. for dessert, i made cinnamon-sugar tortilla chips.... yummy!!

Friday, April 11, 2008

new york!

I figured it'd be in my best interest to log my first visit to New York!! And it might be beneficial to the readers, also....

When Renee and I arrived to La Guardia Airport, we hopped the city bus and then rode the subway into the upper west side, where we met up with Amy! We dropped our luggage off at her place, walked a few blocks down to Central Park, and tried to eat lunch at Alice's Tea Cup.... it was a long wait and we were too hungry, so we stepped into a diner instead. After lunch, we had saved enough room for MAGNOLIA'S!!!! Boy, those cupcakes are dense and yummy!!

After spending more a little time at Amy's place that afternoon, I traveled solo down to MoMA via the subway. This was probably the most exciting memory of mine from the weekend.... only because I saw art in person that I have only studied in the textbook. And since I just had Contemporary Art History last semester, I feel like I appreciated the artwork much much more! I actually knew what I was looking at-- haha! I can't even begin to describe all of what I saw. I only had 2 hours to explore the grand museum (and it was free, thanks to Target!!), so I raced through 3 floors: Painting & Sculpture, Drawing, & the Special Exhibition called Color Chart. I feel like I did a disservice to MoMA, but I had no other choice! :) I saw some of my favorites (Pollock, Miro, Cezanne, Frida, Rauschenberg, Duchamp, Sol Lewitt, Van Gogh, & de Kooning..... just to name a few) and saw some artists for the first time. It was overwhelming, yet so freakin amazing!! Enough of that for now... hehe.

The second part of the night I met up with Amy, Renee, Kristin Greenslit and Danielle Vaccaro. We went to the Beauty Bar and got manicures, then had a NewYork-style late dinner at some French restaurant nearby. A little pricey, but it was very nice.... well, everything's pricey there. We caught a taxi home.

On the second day, Amy had to work for the morning, so Renee and I decided to venture down to the infamous Canal Street on our own. Now, this is the place where you buy fake designer purses from supersketchy people. We took the A train down to Canal St, yet couldn't find the flea market-like vendors (don't ask us how we missed it!) and gave up, so took the train up to Broadway & 34th (I think?) and shopped!! H&M and Zara got most of our attention, and Kristin met up with us at Zara. We were successful and had a lot of fun. Later that afternoon, Amy showed us her Redeemer Church office and then we walked down to Times Square.... stepped into the huge Toys 'R Us and soaked in the crazy tourist culture that Times Square exudes. We sat down at Junior's and had New York cheesecake and watched as Claymates obsessed over Clay Aiken (can i say gross!!?!). From there we searched to buy hats for the party we were going to-- without luck.

That night, we ordered in (you can get anything delivered there!) and got ready for a night out. We walked about 10 minutes to a really amazing apartment. The party's theme was something about wearing some type of headgear. Kristin, Amy, Nee, and I all wore hats-- nothing crazy like some people wore. I watched Carolina lose to Kansas that night and then joined the party crowd. We mingled, talked with some interesting characters, had some wine & weird cookies, then headed back home & slept.

Sunday, we attended church with Kristin. I enjoyed it, even though it was a guest speaker instead of the pastor; I learned new things about Van Gogh! After church, we tried to eat at Alice's Tea Cup with no luck, so we went to Carmine's and enjoyed a whole lot of amazing Italian food! Amy, Nee, and I went to the farmer's/flea market and looked around (I bought a ring!) and then made our last stop at Magnolia's with dual purpose-- to celebrate Renee's 23rd year of living and to buy some goodies to take back to NC. Finally, our trip to NYC was about over. We packed our stuff, caught a taxi, and escaped into the airport's grip.

stuff white people like



the artwork that drew me in... can't find name or artist...


Very briefly today I used my roommate's computer and she had an article from TIME magazine online up. I was drawn in by the artwork posted and then read the title, "Liking What White People Like." So, I read the article. (Very interesting; if you want to read it, click here.)

It's about the popular blog "Stuff White People Like." I visited the blog, and it really is fascinating how seemingly true the posts are.... except if you read the TIME article, the writer isn't caucasian, yet can really relate to most of the stuff white people like. And then I was thinking about how some of my white friends wouldn't relate to a lot of the posts. Is it really about race? [hmph!] I don't like to believe so.

I do, however, understand that the blog is "making fun of white culture-- albeit a very specific slice of urban elitist white culture" (TIME writer, Jennine Lee-St. John).



Sunday, March 30, 2008

oooooh wee oooooh wee oooh

those noises have been in my head for the past couple days.

i'm going to NEW YORK CITY for the first time this weekend. Renee and i will be leaving earlyyyy Friday morning and returning Sunday evening. our good friend Amy just moved up there to work for Redeemer Church, so we're visiting her!!

me, Amy, Renee


something that makes me smile... oh, how i love elephants!

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

keri smith

a friend of mine sent me a link to this artist's website about a month ago, and i find myself referencing it a lot, so i figured i'd share it with everyone i know! she's really interesting.

www.kerismith.com

that's all for now. i haven't been in a writing mood lately.

Tuesday, March 04, 2008

february

consumed with mostly myself during the month of february, i have been terribly introspective and pretty self-centered unfortunately. after jessica left on feb. 6th, i focused on school for a week and then had surgery on feb.12th. and for two weeks, i stayed with my nurturing mother while she cared for me really well. i went through a lot emotionally, thanks to the meds... and not being able to do much physically caused me to look inside, maybe a little too much. i think this whole year, i've been dealing with some self-centeredness and pride issues. today, those issues were forced to the surface.

the first step is recognizing and i hope to be more of a servant and thoughtful for others.


4 days after surgery: my knee after 2 viles of blood were drained from it!

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

short & sweet.

(Am I talking about myself or the blog?)

Me in a nutshell, like I would imagine a baby squirrel:
I'm looking forward to graduating in May. I'm not sure what I'll be doing post-grad, but I'm praying through a few options.

I tore my ACL again, so I'll be having surgery February 12th.


This is how I injured my knee.

My friend, Jessica, is currently living with me and Kate. I love living with her and am sad to send her off to Madrid February 6th! I admire her for following her dreams.

me & Jessica

I got a MacBookPro as an early bday/grad gift, so that's pretty exciting. I am getting comfortable with it and learning new things about it every day. It still needs a name.

I am taking 3 classes (Drawing 2, Figure & Anatomy Drawing, & Senior Seminar), as well as interning with
NoDa School of Arts. I like it so far, and I'm excited to learn about non-profits and hopefully get to teach some. I also hope to volunteer with a couple other art orgs in the area.

Relationship status: single. A good friend of mine swears that 23 years of age is the hardest for a single lady. My 23rd birthday is March 15th. We'll see. This isn't that intimate of a blog, so we probably wouldn't go any deeper than that anyways....

I'd like to start blogging more frequently, so we'll see how that goes.